This is dedicated to my sweet vegetable friend.
“Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for he who promised is faithful.” Hebrews 10: 22
In the bubble of my mid-twenties culture, with friends in-and-out of relationships, starting new jobs, and trying to choose the right insurance carriers, I am beginning to become a bit frustrated and lacking patience with my acquaintances.
I am. At this point with a thousand decisions to make from new jobs and relationships, picking the right phone company and car-insurance, it seems like there are these life-altering decisions that we have to make. But, because of my Faith, and knowing that God rewards those who seek Him, if at the end of the day I choose the wrong car insurance, I’m going to be OK. My life is not ruined. And what is so amazing is that you can take even larger decisions, my dear vegetable friend, and have Faith that whatever is chosen, there’s still hope. There is no decision so bad, or so life-altering that the Lord cannot scoop you up and set you back on the right track.
And what’s frustrating, what’s so frustrating is not that we mess up and do really dumb things. It’s not that we don’t miss out on some pretty cool things by poor judgement. Oh, we do.
But, when you tell yourself, “I suck, I’m the worst.” and you fall into this insecurity that you are weak, and unimportant, or any trait that isn’t IMportant, purposeful, and inspiring.
You are saying the Lord can’t take the decisions I make, and turn them into good things. You are saying that you have more power than the Lord, because the decisions you make can trump his plans.
And let me tell you ladies… Let me spread the word.
Don’t you tell me that you feel bad for cancelling on a just-ok guy, because he may have been the “one.” No. Umm, no. He was not the “one,” and you did not just miss out on your “one” because you decided stay in to watch Gilmore Girls. The Lord does not work that way. You see, He knows what we’re going to choose to do before we do them. And certainly, yes we go through these crappy-feeling times, and we do reep a bit from sewing some wild oats. But, in no universe can any decision you ever, ever, ever, make throw you so far away that the Lord doesn’t have you in his sight. (If you seek Him.)
I feel like there is this thought-process among my lady friends, that on the Christian walk we’re on this road, it’s gold, obviously. And it’s made out of bricks, and I picture too that we’re wearing sneakers. Anyways, the thought-process is that there is this road that we have to stay on, and the guard-rails to stay on the road are rules, and if we break the rules that are more-often than not, not even any God-given suggestions, but superficial rules we’ve made up in our heard, we are doomed for the rest of our life. But, you see that’s a trick, because Christ came and he said those rules you’ve got whirling in your head, they’re not the key to having a husband by twenty-five, your white Kitchen-Aid, and a grand-mother-in-law who is holding furniture for you in her attic. (I feel like I can’t trekk back three years and claim that right?) These rules are useless without Faith and earnestly just seeking the Lord out a little bit.
You are not the worst. You did not screw up the relationship with the future father of your puppy-babies by texting him first after the first date. You didn’t even screw up the relationship with the future father of your puppy-babies by texting him first after the first date, adding him on Instagram and Snapchat, then paying $10 for a Public Records report to confirm he had not passed away.
Honey, the numbers are in our favor. And the one detrimental, heart-breaking moment isn’t the silly choices we’ve made, its any brief turn of-our-head that causes us to doubt the Lord is with us or that He isn’t going to turn your life into a brilliant, Brilliant story to serve Him.
Edited to add: And it’s hard. The second I stopped typing I thought of the Grandmother, with her furniture. And for a brief second kind-of went back there, and wondered if someone better was going to get that furniture. And no, it’s not like that.
“…because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek Him.” Hebrews 11:6