Tough Love

untitledI like being right. More so, I get my kicks off someone telling me I did a good job. Whether its in my job, by a coach, or just a friend who took my excellent advice. Gratification is just lovely.

However, I’ve found recently I’ve incurred quite the opposite! So, how do I get through the shame of being corrected after I make a mistake?

You know its coming. You made a mistake. You sent an incorrect document to a client. You showed your sass to soon. You slipped in maintaining some fitness during the middle of your competition season? None of those? Well, I just gave you my own examples. And you hate it, you already gave yourself an evening long lecture correcting your mistake, making amends. Because you have it under control right? Yea, you screw up, but you know you messed up, and now you’re going to get better.

But, the call to the conference room comes, the phone call from a concerned best friend comes, the German event-rider reminds you that you have two legs.

I think beforehand, or at least if the influx of errors hadn’t narrated my 2018, I’d either respond with indignation or extreme hurt. I’d be so offended, because didn’t they know that I knew I was the biggest flop!?

But no, they’re your manager, your best friend, your coach, they just are trying to shape you into the best version of yourself. It’s not coming from a place of judgement or criticism, but of, “lets make things better.” And admit it, we all want to be better.

The other day I shared a video with a dog-expert that I thought was just adorable as my puppy played catch with a larger dog who at some point had my little scruff in his mouth. But, to me as just puppies, I didn’t see any harm. To my alarm, I was caught off guard when this dog expert informed me this habit could actually become dangerous once they were adult dogs.  Maybe just because I feel as if my dog is my child, or family, in that instant I was so grateful. Of course! Please inform me when I’m incorrectly bringing up my closest companion . I’d do anything to keep him healthy and happy.

Gratitude photo courtesy of US Eventing

As that small critique occurred, at the same time I was pulled to the back conference room, called by a friend, and other occurences where I honestly just wasn’t making some great decisions, sometimes just out of pure naiveté. The one puppy tip, became the catalyst that maintained my grip to gratitude and appreciation for those around me who are trying to encourage me.


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